How to own a horse

I found this somewhere, and thought it too good not to repost. Whoever wrote it sure was spot on. I tell my students who wish to go to college and study Equine studies that they should become Drs or Lawyers instead so they can afford their habit and not be working other people's horses.

TEN EASY STEPS TO GET IN SHAPE TO OWN A HORSE:

1. Drop a heavy steel object on your foot, don't pick it up right away, & shout "Get off! Get off!"
2. Leap out of a moving vehicle and practice "Relaxing into the fall". Roll lithely into a ball, and spring to your feet.
3. Learn to grab your checkbook out of your purse and write out a $200 check without even looking down.
4. Jog long distances carrying a halter and holding out a carrot. Go ahead and tell the neighbors what you're doing.They might as well know now.
5. Affix a pair of reins to a moving freight train and practice pulling it to a halt, smile as if you are really having fun.
6. Practice your fibbing skills. "See, moving hay bales is fun!" and " I'm glad your lucky performance and multi-million dollar horse won you first place!"
7. Practice dialing your chiropractors number with both arms paralyzed to the shoulder, and one foot anchoring the lead rope of a frisky horse.
8. Borrow the US Army slogan; "Be all that you can be'...(add) bitten, thrown, kicked, slimed, trampled."
9. Lie face down in the mud in your most expensive riding clothes and repeat to yourself: "This is a learning experience, this is a learning experience ."
10. Marry Money!